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Communicating with a Person with Alzheimer’s or other Dementia

March 15, 2019

The other day as I was walking through our Memory Care Lane, the memory care wing at our Assisted Living Community in Leominster, MA, I was able to observe the quality care and compassion one of our CNAs was providing one of the seniors living with us. The Resident, whom I will call Nancy (not her real name due to HIPPA) was being attended to by one of our long-tenured aides (whom will refer to as Lisa) who had specialized training in Alzheimer’s Care. Lisa’s approach to Nancy demonstrated several key practices in communicating with a senior citizen with Alzheimer’s or Dementia which I thought would be useful to share.


  • Lisa had approached Nancy from the front, introducing herself, probably for the thousandth time. As Nancy was seated, Lisa got down on her level maintaining eye contact the entire time. Lisa placed a hand on Nancy’s forearm to give her physical comfort. Keep in mind that if the senior is irritated by touch, to avoid this, but be sure to practice the other approach keys – approach from the front, introduce yourself by name, be on the same level and maintain eye contact.
  • Lisa called Nancy by name to help orient her and to gain her attention and focus. Lisa used a lower pitch as it is more calming. She spoke slowly asking Nancy one question at a time in short sentences with simple words so as not to overwhelm Nancy.
  • When Nancy didn’t respond immediately, she patiently waited as Alzheimer suffers often need more time to process. When Nancy didn’t respond, Lisa repeated the question using the same words rather than changing words which can lead to more confusion and agitation.
  • Rather than asking Lisa questions, she turned the question into an answer, providing a solution. As it was close to lunch time, rather than saying “Are you hungry?”, Lisa said “The Dining Room is around the corner. Let me take you there.”
  • To get Nancy ready for the walk to the Dining Room, Lisa placed Nancy’s hand on her walker, providing a visual cue on what Lisa would like her to do. Nancy understood this cue and stood up, allowing Lisa to escort her to her meal.
  • During this entire encounter, Lisa avoided quizzing her, peppering her with questions or asking her questions such as, “Do you remember what you wanted?”. Asking a person with dementia to remember only adds to their frustration. Throughout Lisa presented an easygoing manner with a gentle, kind tone of voice supported by friendly facial expressions. Most importantly, Lisa treated Nancy with dignity and respect.


I was so proud of Lisa that I gave her a Manor Moment, a program of recognition for these numerous special moments at Manor on the Hill.


Please look for more useful information each week. Thanks for reading.


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They say “It takes a village to raise a child”; Knowledge, wisdom, and unconditional love by seniors have a lasting effect on children. Children can also bring happiness and smiles to seniors. We can reminisce about the past when extended families lived close together on the same street or in the same town and interacted frequently. Manor on the Hill (pre-pandemic) had a “Adopt a Grandparent Program” where preschool children came every month to do activities with the residents. This was the most popular activity for both generations. Meaningful activities between seniors and children can be fun and educational. Here are examples of things that the seniors can talk about bringing back nostalgic memories and educating the children at the same time: Tin of Spam: Most children will have no idea what it is however seniors will have memories of tinned meat that could be transported and stored without refrigeration. Rotary phone: Dialing numbers one-by-one, one mistake or busy line and had to start all over again Payphones and a dime in their penny-loafers to call home. Many may have used their dime for a treat at the corner store. Printed references like the phone book, TV Guide and an Encyclopedia set Gramophone records; Side A & B with a handful of songs Silent movies & news reals Rationing during the wars Games they played
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Norma Schofield, a resident of Manor On The Hill, celebrating her 107th birthday with family and friends. She also appeared in Leominster Champion Newspaper. Click here to read what her son has to say.
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